The experience of pregnancy and caring for a newborn baby as a couple is filled with challenges, fights, beautiful sacred moments and crucial life lessons. In a very honest chat, we share with you what have been the highs and the lows for us so far, from bringing home a newborn baby, dealing with constant crying, sleepless nights, constipation, breastfeeding, readjusting our relationship as a couple, division of labour and making it to the milestone of six months old. Hope you enjoy our candour.
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25 Comments
Thank you so much for watching.😊 For those who might comment trying to help before getting through the whole video (understandably – it’s long!), he’s no longer got digestive issues or constipation; three different doctors have said he’s healthy, happy and growing and advised us to continue as we are with the breastfeeding; he’s now eating solids three times a day, taking naps well and going to sleep at night at a regular time… so for now we’re not too worried. But thank you, as always, for your concern.😊🙏🏼
If you still have to feed your baby every 2 hour then you should really have to consider the bottle 🍼, because he doesn't get enough.
We must remember that people are not cookie cutter. One answer is not a fit for everyone. There are indigenous tribes that hold their babies constantly. In my experience one of my children needed to be held by me, not my husband, for most of her babyhood. My other child didn't need to be held all the time. Different temperaments, different nervous systems, different situations all play a role. I used my intuition to guide me. A mother knows the answers if she listens. We are looking for happy, healthy, well adjusted ones that can trust that they're needs will be met. You can not "spoil" a baby. xoxo
I gave both my boys baby formula and they are 18 and 20 now and they’ve turned out just fine. Why don’t you just start giving him a bottle? It’s not going to hurt him one bit and your life will get much better!! Just saying…
39:18 you nailed it in this conversation about the whimsical, beautiful, protected, innocent childhood naturally gives an individual tenacity and a stronger ability to adapt to the challenges of grown up life. I had quite the opposite childhood with lots of danger, instability, chaos, and had to “grow up” way too early and I think it’s directly affected my ability to recover and rebound after difficult circumstances that come up as an adult. In fact a lot of the problems I face now trigger those feelings from my childhood so it’s very layered. I’m grateful for the elasticity of the human brain and the ability to make new connections and rewire it by intentional work but it is so my hope to give my children as best as I can the secure, safe, free childhood so they don’t have to do the painstaking work that I have to do.
Kylie, your husband is truly blessed to have you ie beauty and brains and kindness and a great cook etc!
My heart goes out to you, while you navigate 'sleep'. It must be extremely difficult with so much information, advice from everywhere. I wonder if they have done studies on older kids, teens or adults who have a healthy secure attachment with their parents…..looking at how their parents put them to sleep as a baby? It would be interesting if there were things in common? I guess there are so many factors and each baby and family is different
I think your wee man is hungry and needs pastina two very soft teaspoons he will sleep I’ve had five kids and Giovanni needed this ❤❤❤
Just curious, why you are still feeding every 2 hours at 6 months, I thought babies go longer between feelings? I’ve never breast fed so I do t know if it’s different from bottle feeding.
Kylie and Guido, I feel for you both but it will pass. I did not sleep well until my child turn 5. Just keep swimming!
Wonderful, natural video and great advice from both of you! Your parental instincts will tell you if you are doing what your child needs – they are all distinctly different, whether it be sleep styles or food preferences or emotional requirements, even their interests and activities will be their own. Outside advice can be enlightening, but only you will know what is working for your child, and if you have more, they can be totally different from the other, and you may have to learn everything all over again. As Guido brought up, the one thing they will all need is unconditional love. You will be great parents if you follow your hearts. Loved this episode!
I nursed my 3 boys, and my second son needed to be topped up with formula once or twice daily because he was incredibly hungry! It can also be a night bottle that Guido gives him, allowing you to get some sleep early on in the night. Some babies need to eat more! Also gripe water helped with the constipation and colic my son had. I would never show my children’s photos in social media, and I don’t t even share them on my own private pages. It’s hard because you want to share the beauty with the world- but not everyone is good, and many dangerous people watch. You are right to protect your family. You and Guido will make it through this tough time, just hold tight to each other and remember that this stage passes quickly in the big picture. Love and hugs to you all ❤🤗❤
given your experience with internet "trolls" (we'll call them), you are right to keep him off your channel. As much as I'd love to see him, some things need to be kept private.
Thank you both for sharing your parenthood, you are both doing really well.
May God continue to bless your family.💖🙏💐
I have followed you for so many years …..and watched you grow into this beautiful mature mother!!.. Before you got married ..you were just this young woman finding herself …there were tines I watched uou fior 10 minutes and then switched to another channel…but now..I watch all ur episodes to the end.. and love them all…!!!.
Just showing u holding ur baby and not revealing his face.. is enough for ur viewers.. to see…let him experience the innocents of life with his parents …
Keep up the great work and congratulations to ur new life…Bravo👏👏
Brilliant and realistic! Honest and open conversation-I’m sure there’s something for everyone to learn from this beautiful interaction!
Bless you both! You are really doing your best in what is known to be the most challenging period in a couple's life – the arrival of the first child! Do have another one, pronto, and all will be better!
Generally speaking, psychologically healthy people do not change much over their lifespan. If you have experienced severe mental health problems and developmental traumas and are helped to heal and recover, then you can expect some change for the better, otherwise it is a waste of time to try to change the other. It may work better if you try to change yourself first, and good luck with that.
Regarding child rearing practices, reflect on how humans and mammals evolved over millennia. I would never leave a child to cry, they cannot regulate themselves and need a caregiver. I have left my crying baby for few minutes and have then picked him up again, the rationale being that the sensory change from being put down and then picked up is enough to make an impact. Just think, would you ever leave a grown up person, 30 or 50 years old to scream and cry without trying to sooth/help them? Who would ever want to do that to a baby?
I have worked professionally with children for 25 years. Raised 3 of my own. I was a foster parent and helped raise a niece and nephew for a couple of years. Raising children is blood, sweat, and tears. A healthy average kid will bring you to your knees at some point. But now I am a Nana and look back. Those were the best years of my life despite the challenges. You get them for this very quick 18 years and then their off. They still need you, and the relationship is different. You are more like friends, they have their opinions and need to know their voice counts. My husband left me, the other woman and all that. My oldest son rescued me financially with all his heart. ❤ Everything you invest right now, will pay off forever. You are creating family legacy, a family culture that lasts for generations. Right now you get sleep however possible and surrender the rest. Blessings 😊
Marriage: yes Kylie the man has to evolve. When a man sits reading a newspaper with his wife trying to cook with 3 little kids at her feet. That man knows he is abandoning her, being selfish. He is quietly hoping she will do it all, he gives off a reluctant attitude if asked to help. There cannot be that magical love between that couple. She bears the weight. When my 3 kids were in their teens, easier…not quite. The parenting job is different. You are still hoping to steer them to a successful life. The job of knowing their education assignments, helping them study, driving them to basketball practice, get them to clean their room, do their laundry, pick good friends, etc. Dig in now as partners in the joys, and the challenges. The division of responsibilities is a big one. My son in law walks in from working hard all day and goes straight to the dishwasher or starts cooking. It is not investing properly for the marriage to pretend to not know what to do. A smart man will jump in and be in it with her. ❤❤
My daughter is 13 years old now and I still feel guilty about the night I let her cry it out when she was 5 months old only to learn the next day that two of her bottom teeth had come in. Granted my situation was different because she had already been sleeping through the night. I worried that I would start a trend by holding her and I regret that very much. Also, “secure attachment “ is what you had in your childhood. I did tgat with my kids too and they are very secure out in the world.
Happy Mother's Day!
Karo syrup in bottle of milk will help with constipation.
You can stop breast feeding and give bottles. He will get full and sleep. Maybe your milk has something in it non digestible for him. Everybody's parenting is different.
I know I am sounding alarmist but I hope you do as much background research as you can before embarking on the long list of vaccinations that are now given today.
I feel so sorry for Dr Wakefield when he questioned the whole industry.
In the past if you were royalty or had money you could employ wet nurses and nannies etc.
I presume you do not have that option?
Since the lockdowns and all the rest, I feel that the whole of society has become very much short tempered.
Providing you can keep talking and resolve all the issues, you will have no problem.
Kylie and Guido, this is an excellent and marvelous demonstration of an authentic couple's process of communication from a place of mutual love and respect. My favorite gems were Kylie's point about not trying to both be heard at the same time in a "tit-for-tat" manner, but to focus on one at a time so that both partners feel heard; and, Guido's wisdom about, after truly hearing one another and making the effort to resolve things as much as possible, it is taking the next step by genuinely accepting one another for who you are. Arielle Ford calls this Wabi-Sabi Love, when a couple loves one another, not despite the imperfections but with them and because of them. It is accepting life's imperfections as beautiful and full of character that would be missed if otherwise. This takes loving oneself even more. Thank you for this beautiful conversation.